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Angryman
Angrymanes is among one of the world's greatest pessimists and philosophers of all time. He is this man who kicked out his wife and her lover after he found them making love after work. Famous Teachings "Making a piss poor decision leads to your demise that's why I fell off the ladder the last time damn you, Hermes!" "Oh, way to go numbnuts you succeeded in turning me into a damn jackass!" "This is getting old like me please shut the hell up for the gods!" " I told you once I told you twice I am not your damn friend!" "Oh because I'm a Greek man you expect me to be nude? " Love and Women "He who cleans out his car is a godly man, or so he thinks so! Really he is hiding his stash of smut so his shrew won't find it!" "To achieve lust you must forget all the morals you were taught!" "Oh, here we go again! Damn it, Aphrodite, what's wrong this time!?" The Government and Policies "This isn't an Athenian democracy this is a bunch of batshit ideologies that don't make any sense!"-'Angryman' "Libertarianism is about not being told what to do by big government and also you can carry any damn weapon you please!"-'Angryman on Libertarianism' The Angryman was into teaching people the dangers of government and Liberalism. He opposed the policies of the Moonites to invade Earth. The Commandments of Ridiculism Commandments of Ridiculism were the set of laws that were written down by Angryman himself before he supposedly died from old age well that's how the story went at least. #You shall follow these commandments because they're the only things that are keeping you out of trouble for the time being. #You shall not pass because I am blocking the way. #You shall remain determined through times of struggle or go run away crying like a little brat. #You shall not look at women the same way as a pig because you will become that very pig. #You shall ask only fair prices for what you produce until you get screwed. #You shall strive to make amends with your neighbors before they will kick you in the groin. #You shall speak falsehoods to other animals. #You shall not unleash your anger onto others because they would stop liking you and will never let you borrow their things again. #You shall not give in to lusts because you will fall for the wrong chick. #You shall not abuse power in any form because you will be overthrown and hung like the tyrant you are. #You shall desire no great riches or those riches may not pay off your debt to society that you already screwed. #You shall honor your parents because they can take you out of this world faster they brought you into it. #You shall repay your debt to society because no one is going to do it for a lazy bum. #You shall hold faith or else Zeus will strike you down. #You shall not muddle your mind with too much wine because you will fall down drunk like a fool. #You shall take responsibility for your actions. #You shall not make sacrifices because they don't mean a thing. #You shall not be lazy because you're a waste of space for others around you. #You shall pursuit happiness because you can't be a miserable little jerk all your life. #You shall seek knowledge, for knowledge brings you closer to Zeus. #You shall care for a donkey or else it will kick you. #You shall never look at a girl's breasts because she will smack you in the face Category:Greatest Men of the Stoner Age Category:Politics Category:People Who Should Get a Life Category:Articles in the Newspaper of 1 B.C.